QOTD: “If we amplify everything, we hear nothing.”

“And now I thought we might have a moment, however brief, for some sincerity, if that’s ok; I know there are boundaries for a comedian, pundit, talker guy, and I’m sure I’ll find out tomorrow how I have violated them.

I’m really happy you guys are here, even if none of us are really quite sure why we are here. Some of you may have seen today as a clarion call for action, or some of the hipper, more ironic cats as a clarion call for ‘action.’ Clearly, some of you just wanted to see the Air and Space Museum and got royally screwed. And I’m sure a lot of you are here to have a nice time, and I hope you did. I know that many of you made a great effort to be here today, and I want you to know that everyone involved with this project worked incredibly hard to make sure that we honor the effort that you put in and gave you the best show we could possibly do. We know your time is valuable, and we didn’t want to waste it. And we are all extremely honored to have had a chance to perform for you on this beautiful space, on The Mall in Washington, D.C.

So, uh, what exactly was this? I can’t control what people think this was, I can only tell you my intentions. This was not a rally to ridicule people of faith, or people of activism, or to look down our noses at the heartland, or passionate argument, or to suggest that times are not difficult and that we have nothing to fear. They are and we do. But we live now in hard times, not end times. And we can have animus and not be enemies. But, unfortunately, one of our main tools is delineating the two broke. The country’s 24-hour, politico, pundit, perpetual, panic conflictanator did not cause our problems, but its existence makes solving them that much harder. The press can hold its magnifying glass up to our problems, bringing them into focus, illuminating issues heretofore unseen. Or they can use that magnifying glass to light ants on fire, and then perhaps host a week of shows on the sudden, unexpected, dangerous flaming ant epidemic. If we amplify everything, we hear nothing.

There are terrorists and racists and Stalinists and theocrats, but those titles that must earned; you must have the resume. Not being able to be able to distinguish between real racists and Tea Partiers, or real bigots and Juan Williams or Rick Sanchez is an insult, not only to those people, but to the racists themselves, who have put in the exhausting effort it takes to hate. Just as the inability to distinguish terrorists from Muslims makes us less safe, not more. The press is our immune system. If it overreacts to everything, we actually get sicker, and perhaps eczema. And yet, with that being said, I feel good: strangely, calmly good. Because the image of Americans that is reflected back to us by our political and media process is false. It is us through a fun-house mirror, and not the good kind that makes you look slim in the waist and maybe taller, but the kind where you have a giant forehead and an ass shaped like a month-old pumpkin with one eyeball.

So why would we work together? Why would you reach across the aisle to a pumpkin-assed, forehead, eyeball monster? If the picture of us were true, of course our inabilities to solve problems would actually be quite sane and reasonable. Why would you work with Marxists actively subverting our Constitution, or racists and homophobes who see no one’s humanity but their own? We hear every damn day about how fragile our country is, on the brink of catastrophe torn by polarizing hate. And how it’s a shame that we can’t work together to get things done. But the truth is, we do. We work together to get things done every damn day. The only place we don’t is here or on cable TV. But Americans don’t live here or on cable TV. Where we live, our values and principles form the foundation that sustains us while we get things done, not the barriers that prevent us from getting things done.

Most Americans don’t live their lives solely as Democrats, Republicans, Liberals, or Conservatives. Americans live their lives more as people that are just a little bit late for something they have to do. Often, something they do not want to do, but they do it. Impossible things every day, that are only made possible through the little reasonable compromises we all make.

Look. Look on the screen. This is where we are; this is who we are: these cars. That’s a schoolteacher who probably thinks his taxes are too high. He’s going to work. There’s another car. A woman with two small kids, can’t really think about anything else right now. There’s another car, swaying, I don’t even know if you can see it. The lady’s in the NRA and loves Oprah. There’s another car. An investment banker: gay, also likes Oprah. Another car’s a Latino carpenter. Another car a fundamentalist vacuum salesman. Atheist obstetrician. Mormon Jay-Z fan. But this is us. Every one of the cars you see is filled with individuals of strong beliefs and principles they hold dear. Often, principles and beliefs in direct opposition to their fellow travelers. And yet these millions of cars must somehow find a way to squeeze one by one into a mile-long, thirty-foot wide tunnel carved underneath a mighty river. Carved by people who by the way I’m sure had their differences. And they do it. Concession by concession. You go, then I’ll go. You go, then I’ll go. You go, then I’ll go. Oh my God, is that an NRA sticker on your car? Is that an Obama sticker on your car? Ah, well that’s okay, you go, then I’ll go. And sure, at some point there will be a selfish jerk who zips up the shoulder and cuts in at the last minute. But that individual is rare, and he is scorned not hired as an analyst.

Because we know instinctively as a people that if we are to get through the darkness and back into the light, we have to work together. And the truth is, there will always be darkness. And sometimes, the light at the end of the tunnel isn’t the promised land. Sometimes, it’s just New Jersey. But we do it anyway, together. If you want to know why I’m here and what I want from you, I can only assure you this: you have already given it to me. Your presence was what I wanted. Sanity will always be and has always been in the eye of the beholder. And to see you here today and the kind of people that you are has restored mine. Thank you.”

–Jon Stewart at The Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear, October 30, 2010

the country you love could be your own (FP voter guide 2010)

the official 2010 Voter Guide from False Profit HQ:

Here at False Profit LLC, we care about politics. And we know that you care about politics too. We noticed that one time you read that article about politics and stuff and shared it on your Facebook account. That was totally cool. Now we have another opportunity to make a difference.

Whether or not you believe voting makes a difference doesn’t matter. You should do it because it’s awesome. And nowhere does it matter more than in local elections. Best of all, voting gives you the right to complain. As a San Francisco resident, that’s an inalienable right that they can’t take away from you, no matter how hard they try.

So be sure you vote on Tuesday, November 2. Or else Olivia Wilde will be very pissed at you.

Below is your handy Cheat Sheet to print and take to the polls. Check our web site for the full explanations and more links to do your own research.

Remember: The country you love could be your own.

False Profit Voter Guide Cheat Sheet

CA Prop 19, Marijuana Legalization – YES
CA Prop 20, Congressional District Redistricting- No
CA Prop 21, Vehicle License Fee to Fund State Parks – YES
CA Prop 22, Prohibits State from Taking Local Funds – Yes (with dissent)
CA Prop 23, Suspension of Air Pollution Control Laws – NO NO NO
CA Prop 24, Repeal of Corporate Tax Loopholes – YES
CA Prop 25, Simple Majority State Budget Passage – YES YES YES
CA Prop 26, Approve State and Local Fees with 2/3 Vote – NO
CA Prop 27, Eliminate State Redistricting Commission – Yes

SF Prop AA, Vehicle Registration Fee – YES
SF Prop A, Earthquake Retrofit Bond – YES
SF Prop B, City Retirement and Health Plans – NO
SF Prop C, Mayor Appearances at Board Meetings – NO
SF Prop D, Non-Citizen Voting in School Board Elections – YES
SF Prop E, Election Day Voter Registration – YES
SF Prop F, Health Service Board Elections – YES
SF Prop G, Transit Operator Wages – YES
SF Prop H, Local Officials on Political Party Committees – NO
SF Prop I, Saturday Voting – YES
SF Prop J, Hotel Tax Clarification and Temp. Increase – no
SF Prop K, Hotel Tax Clarification and Definitions – yes
SF Prop L, Sitting or Lying on Sidewalks – NO NO NO
SF Prop M, Community Policing & Foot Patrols – Yes & No
SF Prop N, Real Property Transfer Tax – Yes & No

Barbara Boxer – US Senate
Debra Walker – SF City Supervisor District 6
1) Rafael Mandelman, 2) Rebecca Prozan – SF City Supervisor District 8

GOVERNOR: Meg Whitman is not for me.  I’m voting for Moonbeam!!!

OAKLAND/BERKELEY (ALAMEDA):  WE GOT A LOT ON OUR LOCAL BALLOT TOO.  I support using the Green Party Voter Guide to make those decisions:

Alameda County Local Measures
F – County $10 Vehicle Registration Fee – Yes, with reservations
H – Berkeley: Continuation of School Maintenance Parcel Tax – Yes
I – Berkeley: Continuation of School Facilities Bond – Yes
J – Emeryville: $95 Million School Bond – No, with reservations
L – Oakland: Schools Parcel Tax – No Endorsement, see write-up
N – Albany: Appointed City Attorney – No Endorsement, see write-up
O – Albany: Utility Users’ Tax – Yes
P – Albany: Paramedic, Fire Engines and Ambulance Tax – Yes, with reservations
Q – Albany: Cannabis Business Tax – No Endorsement, see write-up
R – Berkeley: Downtown Plan – No, No, No!
S – Berkeley: Tax on Cannabis – Yes
T – Berkeley: Medical Cannabis – Yes
V – Oakland: Cannabis Tax – Yes
W – Oakland: Telephone Tax – Yes
X – Oakland: Parcel Tax – No, No!
BB – Oakland: Amend Measure Y Funding – Yes

NO EXCUSES, people.  You are LEGALLY ALLOWED to take off work to vote if needed.  and come ON! voting isn’t hard when you have awesome cheat sheets! (or visit SmartVoter.org to make your own informed decision.) DO IT!

more on Prop 19 (Marijuana): Questions and Answers

Nicholas Kristof (NYT) clearly explains the economic and justice reasons for why you should vote yes on Prop 19:

“Sure, there are risks if California legalizes pot. But our present drug policy has three catastrophic consequences.

First, it squanders billions of dollars that might be better used for education. California now spends more money on prisons than on higher education. It spends about $216,000 per year on each juvenile detainee, and just $8,000 on each child in the troubled Oakland public school system.

Each year, some 750,000 Americans are arrested for possession of small amounts of marijuana. Is that really the optimal use of our police force?

In contrast, legalizing and taxing marijuana would bring in substantial sums that could be used to pay for schools, libraries or early childhood education. A Harvard economist, Jeffrey A. Miron, calculates that marijuana could generate $8.7 billion in tax revenue each year if legalized nationally, while legalization would also save the same sum annually in enforcement costs.

That’s a $17 billion swing in the nation’s finances — enough to send every 3- and 4-year-old in a poor family to a high-quality preschool. And that’s an investment that would improve education outcomes and reduce crime and drug use in the future — with enough left over to pay for an extensive nationwide campaign to discourage drug use.

The second big problem with the drug war is that it has exacerbated poverty and devastated the family structure of African-Americans. Partly that’s because drug laws are enforced inequitably. Black and Latino men are much more likely than whites to be stopped and searched and, when drugs are found, prosecuted.

Here in Los Angeles, blacks are arrested for marijuana possession at seven times the rate whites are, according to a study by the Drug Policy Alliance, which favors legalization. Yet surveys consistently find that young whites use marijuana at higher rates than young blacks.

Partly because of drug laws, a black man now has a one-in-three chance of serving time in prison at some point in his life, according to the Sentencing Project, a group that seeks reform in the criminal justice system. This makes it more difficult for black men to find jobs, more difficult for black women to find suitable husbands, and less common for black children to grow up in stable families with black male role models. So, sure, drugs have devastated black communities — but the remedy of criminal sentencing has made the situation worse.

The third problem with our drug policy is that it creates crime and empowers gangs. “The only groups that benefit from continuing to keep marijuana illegal are the violent gangs and cartels that control its distribution and reap immense profits from it through the black market,” a group of current and former police officers, judges and prosecutors wrote last month in an open letter to voters in California.

but there is still some confusion out there.  some of the info in the Chron directly contrasts with the info in the cute animated video we all watched from TheNewLeaf.org

specifically these two:

“Workplace: A nondiscrimination clause would prevent employers from firing or disciplining workers who used marijuana unless an employer could prove that job performance was impaired. Pre-employment testing would be banned. Conflicts with federal law abound. For example, the feds require operators of planes, trains, trucks and buses to be removed from their jobs if they test positive for any narcotic.

+

If Prop. 19 were to pass, such outdoor gardens would not be limited to ostensible medical-marijuana patients. They could show up in any backyard, in any town – and local governments would be powerless to stop them.” –SF Chronicle

New Leaf says that workplace laws won’t change, and that local governments have power to control growing laws in their own jurisdictions.

for all the reasons Kristof explains, i am still voting for it, but in your digging around did anyone find out the real situation is on these two points or is it all written too vague to really know?

i ask myself

noting that the ordering of these two questions changes the meaning/subtext of the exchange:

Q: “does it matter?”
A: “who cares?”

Q: “who cares?”
A: “does it matter?”

whether it changes only a little or quite a lot depends on context.

10.23.10 before/after

before:

after:

full set by Tutu Lee

more:

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h8rs gonna <3

“the more ridiculous, tiny, arcane or completely irrational the object of your outrage is, the more you know you have attained ultimate freedom. You are living the real American Dream, hereby defined as being endlessly upset and miserable about totally meaningless bulls–t for no valid reason whatsoever because you have everything you could ever want or need in this life, ever.”
–mark morford

every once in a while someone who i don’t see in person very often but who keeps up with me online will note that my public/online persona is often very much a hater.

i am aware of this. that’s why i bought myself this t-shirt!

my excuse, and i think many writers will agree with me here, is that it is more often only things that make your blood boil that move you to express more than 140 characters. i know that this is not a good excuse, and in fact believe that more expression of the positive is needed in this world, that all this media and cultural negativity is somehow deeply traumatizing us, individually and collectively. (aside: something the other day prompted me to think for a minute how awesome it would be to have a positive-news-only channel/newspaper).

this is the part that is maybe not obvious, which i want to enunciate: even when i am hating on something, i’m reveling in whatever absurdity i’m finding there, either in the thing itself, or often laughing at my own hating on it. most often this is music, fashion, or art.  i try very hard to have more compassion and less judgment about other parts of people’s lives and their choices. well, except for politics and religion, but that’s a whole other thing there that we’ll not even get into right now. but music, fashion, art: they are put out there as a language, as a message for interpretation, and so i feel ok about critiquing these things, even though, yes, these things are also often very very personal.  even when i am at my most critical, and i’ve said this before, i will support creatives until the end of time in their endeavors in these realms, but that doesn’t mean i also love their art. sometimes the output of a brilliant concept really viscerally sucks.  it’s kind of like loving your 5-year-old’s kindergarten drawings. of course they suck.  but look how much creativity and love!

[it's true that there are some things i just can't get behind and personally support. like sports/fans. but i'll take the cue here and "stop Eeyoring" and this will be the only time i say a word about the fact that "my home team" is in the World Series and no, I DO NOT CARE.  but everyone who does care ("bandwangoneers" and "real fans" alike) should LIVE IT UP AND have fun! i mean it! i will not hate on the Giants or the related ridiculousness going on around here right now.]

back to the more important point: there is no apathy here.  i care deeply about fucking everything. i am one of those who revels in darkness as much as light. i walk the line. just because i am not espousing positivity and puking rainbows does not mean i am unhappy (anxious, maybe. unhappy? no.) or that i do not find joy in the world.  in fact, i still SQUEE over the simplest things, one of the most common being dogs with their heads out the windows of cars on the freeway,  their faces into the wind, mouth open, surely getting smacked by bugs and detritus and dust and tiny rocks, GRINNING. I LOVE THAT THEY DO THAT.  almost enough to make me want to get a dog.  flowers, also. and trees. and moonlight. a simple girl singing a simple song. people’s eyes, reflecting forever.

so please don’t get me wrong. i love humans. i just find human nature wildly incomprehensible sometimes, and the levels of relative absurdity are often overwhelming enough to make me spew.

QOTD: get into trouble

“Mr. STEWART: What’s interesting about that is people will say like, are you nervous about doing the rally? And you’re like yeah. So why do it? Well, why not? What, you know, Steve and I always talk about this, which is when you feel like you want express yourself you need an impetus, you need a catalyst. And part of the catalyst is get yourself in trouble. And that’s how I got into this business, I got myself in trouble, I moved to New York. There was no reason for me to move here. I always had a very happy life bartending at the Bottom Half and working for the state of New Jersey, but I wanted to get myself in trouble because I felt like I would not accomplish anything that meant something to me unless I did. And so moving here was a leap of faith but, you know, what if it didn’t work out? Then it didn’t work out. Life’s not a – there is no guarantee in any way, if you go a simpler path.”

–from the extended interview with Terry Gross

nerves on a plane

Juan Williams, an NPR news analyst, was fired from his job recently for saying that he gets nervous when he sees anyone in “Muslim garb” on airplanes. NPR said they fired him because the statement “undermined his credibility as a news analyst with NPR”.

i can see that. you should know better as a public figure and theoretically impartial news reporter than to say something like that in public.

but here’s the thing: i feel the same way. it’s really hard to not feel that way after 9/11. something horrid happens that scars your memory for life, and anything that recalls that memory makes you nervous. isn’t that normal?

2 weeks ago on our flight back from Detroit a Muslim woman was sitting across the aisle from us. as the plane started to take off, which did happen to be just after sunset, she started to do her evening prayers, bowing repeatedly and murmuring to herself as the plane was taking off. it made me nervous, and i FELT TOTALLY GUILTY FOR FEELING NERVOUS. but i couldn’t help it. soon after that, she went to sleep, and i felt even dumber. but then, as we approached SFO for landing and they told everyone to turn off all their electronic devices, she was awake and tapping away at her iPhone. for the entire duration of the descent and landing. as far as i understand the instructions, this isn’t allowed, and so it seemed like she was deliberately defying this well-understood part of flying. this made me nervous. is that wrong?

here’s the twist: if anyone non-Muslim was sitting next to me on a plane tapping on their iPhone during landing, i might have said something like “hey, you’re supposed to turn that off”. but specifically because i didn’t want to appear discriminatory, i said nothing. so in effect, i did treat her differently than i would have treated someone else, but it kept me from saying something i would have said, not made me say something i wouldn’t have.

i agree with Joe Scarborough who paraphrased the commentary as “Listen I understand people get nervous, sometimes I get nervous, but we’ve got to move past that. We can’t paint an entire faith with this.” exactly.  i couldn’t help but be nervous.  i would not feel weird around or treat a someone wearing Muslim attire differently at work, in a grocery store, in a park, in a restaurant, or anywhere else. but if they are doing what seem to be odd things on a plane? i’m sorry but i couldn’t help feeling that way.  so, i have empathy for Juan Williams, and i think the guy should get a break.  but i don’t think getting nervous in this situation means i have anything against Muslims in general or believe we should treat them any differently on planes or anywhere else.  i agree we should definitely try to move past those feelings, individually and culturally, and also definitely not “paint an entire faith” because of 9/11. but it’s gonna take a while.

my apologies if anything i’ve said here offends anyone, but this is a live discussion that’s going on right now and because i recently had a direct experience with the situation, i thought i would be honest and contribute my experience to the debate.  thoughtful comments are appreciated.

such a classic girl

i look at this “classic girl” set of options from American Apparel and i am so confused. high waisted undergarments? what look like Mom Jeans? polo shirts?  i thought the whole point of fashion was NOT to look like this. it is things like this that make me feel like i am really losing touch with reality and going insane, because reality is starting to seem really, really strange to me.

i know this is a very rote commentary, older people with their “kids these days!” statements, but honestly: none of the items in that selection are appealing to me and i don’t think it’s because i’m over 30.  someone please explain to me what is going on.

little earthquakes

it has become apparent that i am going through one of those phases again where i am having a series of small breakdowns. mini crises. freak outs. anxiety attacks. little earthquakes. i hereby recognize and am doing what i can to stop the pattern and prevent a big one. please forgive me if i am not my self right now.